So I was having a conversation with a girl at a party (it happens sometimes) and she was telling me with complete authority that all about Europeans don't bathe or brush their teeth or shave parts as much as Americans do. I smiled and told her, "I'm pretty sure you're mistaken... for the most part. I've never met a single European who fit that description." She shook her head and told me that one time she met a girl who was from Switzerland (or Sweden or Germany, she couldn't remember and now neither can I) who bathed once a week and rarely washed her hair AND had nasty long armpit hair. My response was "Are you really basing your entire opinion of Europeans on that one encounter?" She nodded. Either she was incredibly stupid or incredibly drunk, but in either case I'm beginning to think that my brain must be transplanted from some other higher life form.
I say this because not ten minutes later another woman, who was middling-aged and quite intoxicated, insisted that there's cocaine in Red Bull... I asked her if she was thinking of the energy drink called COCAINE, which is no longer available in stores, but still available online and (as far as I know) narcotic free... but Drunk Cougar was absolutely insistent that there's cocaine in Red Bull and that if you drink it you will ABSOLUTELY get addicted to it. I sipped my Vodka/Red Bull with increasing disdain but indulgence. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I'm not always the cleverest person in the room, I just use my brain more than some.
I should find some other uses for my amazing brain. Maybe I'll work on my book some more.
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